Sex, rape and camels

The DAP recently launched a campaign against rape which I found rather timely, and it triggered a response that was awkward to say the least.

Turns out that the Muslim community in Malaysia believes that married couples are not subject to the belief of marital rape.

Go back to Game of Thrones Season 4, imagine the Lannisters being a married couple looking down at a dead King Geoffrey and going at it to no avail; yeah, I'm guessing by the statements made, Malaysian Muslims can do that too.

I wonder if anyone bothered to show that to the mufti of Perak and ask him if that was permissible in Islam.

Speaking of which, when a mufti goes out and says historically women would have to acquiesce to sex even on the back of camels if their husbands demanded it, I'm wondering if he considers what this translates to in the current world.

Would it mean that men riding a motorcycle can tell their wives to take the handles while he pleasures himself?

Perhaps it would also mean women must obey their husbands urges in the car if he gets a stiffy while driving. That could actually explain people suddenly driving slow in the fast lane.

Follow up question: What if the husband wants to join the "mile high club"? Would the wife have to allow the husband to take her right there and then in the centre aisle of an AirAsiaX flight bound for Melbourne, for example?

Would the police now have to allow married couples to have sex in the back seat of their cars, too, regardless of laws on public decency?

What I am highlighting may be rude, off tangent and some might even find it downright disrespectful, but you know what?

These are and will be the jokes made of Islam because one mufti spoke out without deep thought to what his words may mean to the rest of the 7 billion plus humans living on this planet.

And you know they will find that piece of news because it will be on the Internet.

At a time when the world is so overpopulated and devaluing life to the point of letting thousands die in the Mediterranean Sea and blaming Nepal's lagging faith as a reason for more than 5,000 deaths, must we really even talk about sex?

Fine, let us talk about sex.

Ladies, if your husbands agree with the mufti, file for a divorce. It's acceptable. If your fiancé agrees with the mufti, call it off. It is also acceptable.

And if you're having sex with your boyfriend and he refuses to use a condom, you do have the right to abort the pregnancy.

Historically, women in Islam have always had and held their own. That is not feminism, that is equality and justice. In fact, it is a seething injustice that divorced women are not paid their dues.

Something that perhaps the muftis would care to comment on rather than sex.

With regards to this, I do believe the federal government has launched a new campaign where specialised counters for complaints against ex-husbands lagging in alimony payments have been introduced.

Ladies, I shouldn't even be telling you that sex is sex; but it is what it is.

It goes beyond religion, because without it there would be a reduced world population, and rape wouldn't even happen.

But then again, if we go by the mufti’s word, there's no rape in Islam.

Then again, women can't have sex during their menstruation cycle, so feel free to use that as an excuse all year round if your husbands insist.

Then again, he may look for another wife. But then again, he has to do so with your blessing.

And if he doesn't, according to Malaysian shariah law, all he has to do is pay a fine.

Yeah, I know it's messed up.

And I don't know what to tell you other than it is messed up, especially since I'm not technically married, a woman, or even interested in women beyond comments of "nice shoes" or "that's a lovely ensemble you're wearing".

Or the occasional "love the hair".

But yes, we do need reformation in shariah law with regards to the rights of women as well as legislation to ensure it is protected not just in marriages, but also in terms of everyday living.

And there are a lot of issues to deal with from birth control to abortion to even halfway homes for abandoned babies from unwanted pregnancies.

Then there's sexual harassment, the innocuous shaming when it comes to peer pressure to put on a headscarf, and even addressing the need to go for gynaecology check-ups regardless of virginity status.

And then there are the issues of representation both in business and politics, though I have to tell you this, if you are asking people to vote for you beyond their political beliefs simply because you are a woman, then you are being sexist.

Permatang Pauh, do take note.

All this is part of education, which I do believe is lacking, either formally in schools or informally in homes.

And it should not just be for women, but also men. More importantly men, because for some odd reason Malay men can go about threatening women with rape without thinking of what it means.

Maybe it is brainless trolling, or maybe it's just the "bangang" Malays I eluded to in the last column.

Or maybe it is just the fact that they are porn addicts with a fetish in rape sex.

Gender equality, after all, is part of our federal constitution, even if it took us awhile to actually add it in there by an amendment only in July 2001. That's right, you got the vote first before constitutional equality.

But I will tell you this, have a read of the salaries and wages report and see the gap in incomes between single women and single, divorced women.

Take a look at which states offer equal pay and which have such a huge gap that it makes no sense.

Chances are, you are being discriminated without even knowing it. – April 30, 2015.

This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of The Malaysian Insider.